1. The claim is made against the policyholder, but your wife will be recorded as the driver

2. You are obliged to report 'all claims and losses' so you should have advised them.  However you can settle it yourself direct if both parties agree

3. Your wife was involved in a fault accident.  The other parties insurance company are entitled to use the provided details to identify your insurer.

4. They can be guided by you, but the decision as to whether to pay out or not is theirs.  Remember, they are in business to make money, so they will not pay out more than they have to. (After all they are paying the repairer, not the other insurance company)

5. See 4. above 

6. Pre-existing damage is excluded from any assessment, but you have a responsibility to pay to put the damage caused right.  With bumpers, this often means a replacement, and a new one at that as bumpers are designed to take the damage in order that the rest of the car doesnt.  The fact that there was already scratches on the bumper does not preclude this.

Overall you have my sympathies, because the only one actually benefits from this kind of claim is the repairer (the other driver has probably found a friend to provide an inflated quote) - and we all end up paying more in premiums because of it

In early May my wife driving my car had a brush in the car park with another car it was just a transfer of black from my bumper to his coded bumper which was already pretty tatty on an oldish car  "G " but might have been a little newer.

He went ballistic demanding that she accept "liability" would not discuss exactly what for and threatened to call the police if she did not. Disturbed by his attitude she rang me but he refused to speak to to sort it out and continued with his rant.

I advised her to give name address and our Reg No.which she did to his wife and left with him still ranting.

We heard nothing for months until I recieved a letter from my ins co."A"inviting me to fill out a claim form. I rang to say I had not made a claim and it transpired that they had receiced one for £400 from his ins "L".I told them that the damage did not amount to more than £50 and if they could not settle for that L could contact me direct. Weeks went by and L wrote advising me to make a claim to A or they would start proceedings. I replied outling the circumstances and confirmed my offer of £50

More weeks and I telephone my co. A only to be told they had paid out £200 which if I wanted I could reimburse to protect my no claims.

I am not an expert would like to know if I am right in thinking that:-

1- the claim should have been made against my wife since she was driving

2-that I am not obliged to even report this sort of claim to my insurance co and I am entitled to settle it myself if I so wish.

3-that I do not have to disclose my ins details to the other party and that the use of the data base in these circumstances was an abuse of the act. 

4-that my ins co. should not have paid up against my wishes.

5- that this cosy arangement is not to customers best interests leading to bloated claims which the punter eventually pays in the form of lost discounts and increased payments.

6-The cost to me will be vastly  more than the damage caused