I had a similar experience but my branch sounds much more customer friendly than the one you dealt with.
they will take the money on the 14th whether you have the money available or not, but they wont charge you if a charge makes you overdrawn (except deibt interest).. however if you have anything else that is going to come off on the 14th or before money gets paid in then they will charge you £35 for each one.
They wont allow you to close the account without paying it back.
They should refund your first ever charge. When I asked I was told that because I had never had a charge back before they can refund my first ever charge as "goodwill" so if you have never had one before try going back to them again, it is worth a try. what that advisor said is not the instructions as my charge was refunded last week! I It could be the case that that advisor could not be bothered giving you it back if it involved more work.
If that doesnt work, once you have got the account back into credit there is a high street full of banks just waiting for new business......